Omegle.com

If you're ever bored and lonely, you should probably get some friends besides your hand. Go out and meet people. Be a productive part of society.

If you try to follow that advice and fail, you can always be like me. Spend your time in front of a weird HP computer screen that makes my eyes bloodshot after four straight hours. Bounce between chat rooms where you pretend to be 532lb woman who just needs some love and a facebook profile where nobody but your classmates messages you in a mass email. You also are allowed to have a blog where you pour your heart out in one post and subsequently contridict yourself in the next.

If these all fail, you can go to omegle.com where you're put into a random chat with a complete stranger, known as "Stranger", and talk about whatever, whoever, whenever, whyever...that last word was not actually a word but I said it anyway so you can go suck (insert sexual humor). Here is just one my many interactions that I've experienced with this website.

Stranger: HELP ME
You: How?!
Stranger: Okay, first things first, is your door locked?
Stranger: !!!
You: Yes!
Stranger: IF ITS NOT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD LOCK YOUR FUCKING DOOR!
Stranger: Thank god.
Stranger: Do you have a gun? CAN YOU GET ONE!
You: I can't! The door is locked!!
Stranger: A crowbar will do in a snap though, if you have one of those. Come to think of it.
Stranger: AHHH!!!! WE'RE FUCKED THEN!
You: Okay okay I got a crowbar!!
Stranger: Oh! Great. Now.
Stranger: This is the tricky part. Smack yourself in the head.
Stranger: Until you lose consciousness.
You: Wait....what?!
Stranger: Let me know when you've done this.
Stranger: No no, this part is key.
Stranger: Trust me.
You: Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow.
You: Ow. Ow. Owwwwwwww.saj eomfd ehoooooooheohp's/z
Stranger: K good. Thats what you get for being a horrible leech on society, and just sitting on the internet all day. Zombie Jesus lives!

You know you want to go try it now.