Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Nap Time

I sleep more than I need and less than I want.

When others are running through sprinklers,
when starstruck eyes gaze upon blasts of color.
In the high heat where dogs' tongues taste air,
in a cornucopia of blankets to shelter from the frost.

I sleep more than I need and less than I want.

To forget the aches and pains of the day,
to prepare for the aches and pains of tomorrow.
To remember the joys, the happiness of before,
to escape into a world where love is never overused.

I sleep more than I need and less than I want.

What the Heart Knows

I don't pretend to know you
because I don't think I ever will.
You've taken everything I've known
and mangled it into a new sensation
that I'm not sure I like it.

I looked to you for the first time in love
and now I look to you in fear
because I'm scared of more than just us.
I'm scared of waking up and falling asleep.
I'm scared I've become too attached.

But this newfangled love is not new really.
It's just a collection of all the mediocre good
with scatterings of all the worst bad.
How can I walk away from the past
when it is now the gift you're giving every day?

The past is four letters.
Four letters of hate, pain, hurt, lies.
Four letters that are gone
yet you pour it down around me
like leaves in the fall.

I love you in spite of myself.
No. I love you to spite myself
and though I beg my heart to forgive me my sins, 
I cannot bring my feet to run away.
I love you but I promise I don't like it.